I want to do good and I want to be very pleasing but it is hard because I do not remember if my reflection, my devotion is on, for lack of a better term the thesis statement :

Why Good Girls Get Punished

                      or

Why it is Important to be a Good Girl

I can write both but I am not sure witch one so I am going to go with the latter because it suits Johnny’s esoteric style.  While it may not be esoteric to most it is to me because you never know what they, they being Doms, are looking for.  I like specifics and they never give them!

So here goes.

I know you might expect me to write that I think it is important to be a good girl so I do not get punished but punishment is only a small part of a bigger picture.  Punishment like writing keeps my focus and puts me back in subspace where I belong, where I wish to dwell all the time but why it is important to be good is so much more than that.

For me , being pleasing is the most important and when I am not pleasing I am not really happy and I have no sense of my own perfection but only how another sees me and If you do not think I am perfect then I am not pleasing. The only opinion in that matter is that of the Master.

Yes, I will push boundaries when I am not in control and or to test you and want and expect you to keep those boundaries closed and not let me slip through a crack in the wall because even in my success I will fail.  Fail both you and myself.

The most important reason to be a good girl is because it makes me happy to be good.  It makes me happy to be who you want me to be and I cannot be any of those things if you do not remind me.

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